Daughter wants a gun

[blchandl2]

My 24 year old daughter who is living with her BF wants to get a gun. She is an adult and I cannot stop her but it does make me nervous. I have taken her shooting a few times and tried to teach her gun safety. She plans to take a gun safety class which eases my nerves a little.

She is interested in a Ruger SR9C which should be a decent first gun. I just hope she takes gun safety seriously. I grew up around guns and went hunting and shooting regularly. Gun safety was stressed at a very young age.

How have the rest of you handled this?

Nervous Dad

 

[kilimanjaro]

Take her to the range and re-assess her safety skills. Deal with the reality that reveals itself there, not the one you're worried about. You probably bought her first car, right? That was far more dangerous.

Then stop obsessing. Would you leave her defenseless to satisfy yourself?

The subliminal mantra implanted that people are safer without guns than with them is a canard. Deprogram yourself.

 

[Pahoo]

Are both of you, ready ???

How have the rest of you handled this?

You probably know your daughter better than anyone else and will find the way. I have three daughters and my youngest one is ready. She asked and will take a course as well. For a long time now, she has had some very good reasons to have a firearm. The firearm that I am providing, comes complete with ammo, rage-time and continuing of daily prayers. ....

Be Safe !!

 

[CaptainO]

Teach her to use a revolver...

Then suggest a .38 Special revolver. Why?

a) A simple "manual of arms".

b) Inherently easier to use under "stress-fire" conditions.

c) Far more "idiot-proof" under adverse conditions.

I am sorry that I cannot recommend a self-loader for a new shooter. "Murphy's Law" almost always comes into play in a self defense scenario.

Generally speaking, they perform better in a "bad" situation in the hands of a "less than thouroughly experienced" shooter.

 

[TunnelRat]

I'm sort of curious. You say you grew up around guns and went hunting and shooting regularly. Yet you mention taking your daughter shooting, "a few times", and are concerned about her safety with handguns. Did you not teach your daughter gun safety as she grew up?

 

[Cheapshooter]

^^^that^^^

 

[Moonglum]

She is an adult and I cannot stop her

That kinda sums it up doesn't it?

 

[TXAZ]

It would be worth the few bucks to talk to an instructor at a local range, then have him / her give her some training and weapon selection. I'm sure you capable of doing this, but there's a family political issue here that having a layer of insulation could help in an area that could get dicey fast. Been there and glad we had a third party involved.

 

[Scatcatt]

Shoot guns together. Go to the range together ect. My dad and I shoot guns all the time. He has no issues with my ability to handle my gun or gun safety. It's nothing for me to go to my parents house on the weekend and shoot guns with them. Once you assess her ability you can stop worrying.

 

[K_Mac]

I have a 36 year old daughter that I would love to own a handgun. I didn't shoot much when she was growing up and she didn't have any real interest. With that said, I would still be nervous until I had the chance to make sure she understood safe handling and use of her weapon if she decided to get one. While I taught her how to ride a bike, drive a manual transmission vehicle, and speak her mind among many other things, the first thing I would do is get her a couple of lessons with a professional trainer. Of course she is a grown woman and will do what she wants....

I think the SR9c is a fine choice. I carry one daily. If she is comfortable with it I see no reason why it wouldn't be a good choice for her. Go shoot with your daughter. I am a little envious. Good luck.

 

[hikingman]

A can of worms spills during some of these threads. We are talking about someone old enough to legally own a pistol.

My thoughts often lean toward first-time owners, or the uninitiated-especially their comfort level with handguns (or one in particular), and their motivation for owning or possessing one. Those that have spent little time around shooting sports, or hunting-same idea.

To the comfort level idea, it's alarming how many individuals have one at home, and the person is intimidated about it for various reasons (unloaded or otherwise). This may be very little practice time, little or no experience with it, and fear often goes along with the gun (or the idea of using it).

To the motivation part, and let's say the comfort level is good, and the person practices with it at regular intervals (two, three, or more range or practice sessions and definitely more than a few rounds of ammo per session).

Is the gun for shooting sports primarily, and readily available for self protection on a part-time or regular basis? Is the gun very definitely out of the reach of children or other adults/unauthorized persons? For self defense, there's a very definite need for hours of research/reading/learning about responsibilities, federal/state/local laws, and understanding much about the use of a pistol or other gun for self defense, IMO.

 

[jmhyer]

I say buy her the SR9...and insist that she let you pay for her handgun course. Take the class wth her and go shooting with her at other times. She will easily be able to handle it. And I think it's better to know that you helped equip her with what's necessary to defend herself than to know that she's defenseless.

 

[bedbugbilly]

She's an adult - 24 yo - living with her BF . . . .

While you know your daughter better than anyone else, perhaps it would be better if she took some gun safety and SD shooting classes under an "unbiased" instructor who will treat her like a student . . . not a daughter? While I'm sure you have some concerns . . . she needs to be treated like an adult. If she is old enough to make the decision to live with somebody . . . perhaps she is old enough to decide what she wants as far as owning and having a firearm?

Your concerns as a parent are understandable but at some point, a child has to be treated as an adult. When I was 24, I had been married for five years, completed college and was working as was my wife. The last thing I would have wanted was my father stepping in telling me what I should or should not do. While he might have offered advice if asked for, he also understood that I was an adult and capable of making my own decisions.

You can certainly make recommendations as to where she can get training, etc. But let an unbiased instructor decide whether she is ready or not . . . if not, any instructor worth their salt will let her know. As far as what handgun she chooses . . . . that also should be her decision as it will be her handgun and she will be the one using it.

 

[tahunua001]

I learned gun safety the hard way, through stupidity with BBguns and a jerk of an older brother. after shooting out your bedroom window while playing you learn not to play with a gun that might be loaded, after getting shot with a bb gun you learn that something bigger than a BB is likely to hurt more than a little. after those lessons were learned the rest just came naturally, proper firearms technique was learned later. I think your daughter will do fine, the SR9C is my daily carry. there are very few guns I like as much as the SR series pistols, especially for beginners.

 

[Hal]

Some things are best left to a stranger to teach....

Shooting and driving are the two biggies I can think of.

I refuse to teach anyone, let alone a relative, how to shoot.
I'm more than happy to take them out shooting and give them tips - - once they've learned the basics of how to do it.

 

[Cosmodragoon]

I'm sort of curious. You say you grew up around guns and went hunting and shooting regularly. Yet you mention taking your daughter shooting, "a few times", and are concerned about her safety with handguns. Did you not teach your daughter gun safety as she grew up?

While nobody can change the past, there is a valuable lesson for the future. Whether you like guns, you enjoy gun culture, or you just value gun rights; it is crucial that we teach our children to respect, understand, and properly use firearms. The obvious point is that they will be safe, responsible, and confident with or around guns throughout their lives.

The deeper point is more subtle. There is no question that our rights are under constant attack. A significant part of those attacks take the form of institutional propaganda that is specifically targeted towards your children. At the same time that we lose a lot of help to apathy; we have schools, popular media, and other ostensibly trusted sources spreading misinformation and fear regarding guns and gun rights. There are literally organized forces trying to brainwash future generations on this issue. Having your kids involved in fun and responsible gun-related activities will not only work to immunize them against that ilk; it will help them to later become active adults in the fight against it.

 

[g.willikers]

Instead of hoping she will get the training, how about making the arrangements and paying for that training for both her and the boyfriend?
Like an introductory gift to the world of shooting.

 

[adamBomb]

My 24 year old daughter who is living with her BF wants to get a gun. She is an adult and I cannot stop her but it does make me nervous. I have taken her shooting a few times and tried to teach her gun safety. She plans to take a gun safety class which eases my nerves a little.

She is interested in a Ruger SR9C which should be a decent first gun. I just hope she takes gun safety seriously. I grew up around guns and went hunting and shooting regularly. Gun safety was stressed at a very young age.

How have the rest of you handled this?

Nervous Dad

Why would you want to stop her? I was so relieved when my 25yr old sister expressed interest in guns this year. She had never shot in her life even though my father is an avid hunter, me and my brothers shot guns our whole lives, and there were guns all over our house growing up. I guess she was just never interested. Anyway....

We had her try out all of our guns. Fortunately combined we had like 10+ guns for her to shoot. Overall she liked the glock 42 the best because it was small and she could aim very well with it because its a larger 380 gun. I tried to convince her to go with a revolver but she wasn't into it so we went with this.

We taught her all of the basics for safety, carrying, storing, etc. BUT she is taking a class from a certified professional. We stressed practice, etc. Hopefully she is on the right path. You can only do so much so try to educate and let her know what she needs to do. Training from a professional is a must.

it is crucial that we teach our children to respect, understand, and properly use firearms. The obvious point is that they will be safe, responsible, and confident with or around guns throughout their lives.

I have started teaching my 5 yr old already with a bb gun. He wont shoot it yet because he is nervous around it and I wont pressure him but we go over safety and he watches me shoot it and loves seeing me hit the targets. My 1 and 3 yr old are too little but will be there soon enough too. They dont know I own real guns yet but I have no problem showing them the guns and taking them shooting when they are ready.

And just a side story here to show that my teaching has helped...we were away over the holidays at a relatives and my son used the bathroom in their bedroom. He saw a shotgun, which was loaded. He didnt touch it and immediately came and told me and I told my relative to put them away when the kids are around. I learned two things that day - that my kids are learning from my training and that I need to tell people who do not have little kids to kid proof their house before my kids visit.

 

[Targa]

My girlfriend was 37years old before she ever fired a gun and that was with me. I taught her the fundamentals and when I realized how much she enjoyed shooting I signed both of us up for a firearms safety/CCW class. We had a great time and she absolutely loves range days.

 

[tallball]

She is 24 and will do as she pleases.

What sort of help or advice she may or may want/accept is based on personalities and history we know nothing about.

If someone is going to learn thoroughly and practice regularly, any handgun they choose (in an effective caliber) will be fine. If they are going to take a class, go to the range once or twice, then leave it in a drawer for years or decades, a revolver is better.