I to am a returned serviceman in Australia I have been asked this question by both children and adults. Children I can understand as they are naturally inquisitive and I just explained that there are some questions that you shouldn't ask and why. With the adults you have probably noticed that they have never served their country, community or they would know that the question is very rude and inappropriate. The only times that I have been asked this by adults has been at my local pub and I just let the person know that it is definitely none of their business and go back to enjoying my beer. just my 2 cents worth.
Asking someone if they've shot/killed another person...
- Thread starter Sparks2112
- Start date
How bout if I just ask a general question like "what's it like over there?" or something. I find information firsthand about that stuff is alot more enlightening than press or news or crap movies etc. If you are really not wanting to relate anything at all about it, fine, but I would think you might want to tell your side of the story so that CNN is not all that anyone knows about it. To a receptive audience, of course, not some activist kook. My grandfather never told anything much about being in WW1 and so I have no real information about his experiences and wish that he had not clammed up about it as that is lost now.
Wildalaska
Moderator
Nice reply:
"Only when I'm in the mood"
WildyoudevilyouAlaska ™
I voted it was OK, because it is OK with me, if someone asks me.
It's been my experience that most people who act solemn and aloof about it, haven't ever killed anyone, but they want to give that impression without lying.
Killing someone isn't anything to be proud of or brag about, but depending on the circumstances it is not that big a deal. Its what had to be done, nothing more, nothing less.
War, police duty, self defense, it happens and everyone I know who has killed someone(a considerable number by the way) is upfront and matter of fact about it. Not because they are proud of it, or because they are cold and heartless, but because it had to be done.
This includes, LEOs, WW2, Korea and Vietnam vets and even mercenaries, all relatives, friends or close personal acquaintances of mine. None of them are liars, braggarts or overly boastful about it, they just tell the truth in a matter of fact way.
It's been my experience that most people who act solemn and aloof about it, haven't ever killed anyone, but they want to give that impression without lying.
Killing someone isn't anything to be proud of or brag about, but depending on the circumstances it is not that big a deal. Its what had to be done, nothing more, nothing less.
War, police duty, self defense, it happens and everyone I know who has killed someone(a considerable number by the way) is upfront and matter of fact about it. Not because they are proud of it, or because they are cold and heartless, but because it had to be done.
This includes, LEOs, WW2, Korea and Vietnam vets and even mercenaries, all relatives, friends or close personal acquaintances of mine. None of them are liars, braggarts or overly boastful about it, they just tell the truth in a matter of fact way.
I had a gunshop dude ask me that one time, made me want to tell him do something creative with the stupid plastic Taurus he was pushing. I just left instead. It's an ugly and tactless way to ask somebody about their experiences.
I sure as heck don't ask my friends that when they come back from various unpopular vacation spots. Seems rude. Those are stories a person has to decide on their own to tell.
I sure as heck don't ask my friends that when they come back from various unpopular vacation spots. Seems rude. Those are stories a person has to decide on their own to tell.
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Whether and how to answer is, to me, highly circumstantial. Sparks' description suggests that the question was rudely asked. Whether it deserved a rude answer would, for me, depend on my history with the questioner, my relationship with my host, the other guests, and their reactions, and whether I was inclined to educate, punish, or simply ignore. Most likely, I would have trotted out the "Ahhh, yet another subject for the 'Don't ask, don't tell' list."
Sgt.Fathead
Moderator
Older, heavier (fat) and gray and bearded, I don't get this question much any more. I got it quite often just out of The Corps and never could figure out how to answer it, then, as it floored me every time. Someone posted earlier that with small kids or teenagers, it was usually just inquisitiveness or lack of maturity. With adults, wow, why are you asking me that?
Among fellow vets I can talk about some things and most people want to hear something and all of us have our humorous sea stories, too. Last time I was asked that question, at least ten years ago at a friend's wedding, I replied by asking if they'd ever done so and that seemed to shock and shut them up. I walked away, too.
Wasn't it DeNiro in "Ronin" that was asked if he'd ever killed and replied, "No, but I hurt someone's feelings once." That would be my answer from now on.
Among fellow vets I can talk about some things and most people want to hear something and all of us have our humorous sea stories, too. Last time I was asked that question, at least ten years ago at a friend's wedding, I replied by asking if they'd ever done so and that seemed to shock and shut them up. I walked away, too.
Wasn't it DeNiro in "Ronin" that was asked if he'd ever killed and replied, "No, but I hurt someone's feelings once." That would be my answer from now on.
Scattergun Bob
New member
Sparks
The very real issue is that sheep need sheep dogs like us to protect them from the wolves, but for some odd reason sheep don't like sheepdogs and would rather have them penned inside a glass case only broken open when needed.
I avoid or simply lie when this question comes along, after all it is really only my conscience at stake and others will simply have to guess.
My best to you, Bob
The very real issue is that sheep need sheep dogs like us to protect them from the wolves, but for some odd reason sheep don't like sheepdogs and would rather have them penned inside a glass case only broken open when needed.
I avoid or simply lie when this question comes along, after all it is really only my conscience at stake and others will simply have to guess.
My best to you, Bob
Wildalaska
Moderator
No....the sheep prefer folks who don't pretend to act like sheepdogs.
WildbaaaaaaaaaaaAlaska TM
I would say that asking the question in person is in very poor taste. Rude is probably a reasonable description.
Asking the question online to a general audience is not at all the same since no one is put on the spot. Some people will still be offended, but that's largely their own choice since they can simply ignore the thread if they want to remain unoffended.
Asking the question online to a general audience is not at all the same since no one is put on the spot. Some people will still be offended, but that's largely their own choice since they can simply ignore the thread if they want to remain unoffended.
First I think it is okay to ask if a person is okay with sharing personal experience with many of life's situations...
second... on the few occasions (never served in a public service which it would be a possibility) I have been asked if I have shot and/or killed anyone I have either changed the subject or honestly answered.. "I am not sure...".
I have to leave it at that...
Brent
second... on the few occasions (never served in a public service which it would be a possibility) I have been asked if I have shot and/or killed anyone I have either changed the subject or honestly answered.. "I am not sure..."
.I have to leave it at that...
Brent
Trigger Finger
New member
I think it's rude unless you know AND get along with the person. And if that person asks in the right climate. In a room full of people, half of whom you may not even know, is not the right climate!
I would tend to say maybe, or lie and say no. Maybe I would say something funny, at least funny to me like, well I haven't killed any one today but the day isn't over yet.
I would tend to say maybe, or lie and say no. Maybe I would say something funny, at least funny to me like, well I haven't killed any one today but the day isn't over yet.
Shadi Khalil
New member
I hate football and love to ask rude and invasive questions. Got that girls number?
Just kididng...really, Im just joking. honestly.
my girlfriend reads the sight from time to time.
Just kididng...really, Im just joking. honestly.
my girlfriend reads the sight from time to time.