Utimate Catfight: Hilllary vs. Monica

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Mike in VA

New member
Mind numbed from commuting in DC on a rainy, foggy, cold, raw, crappy Tuesday, not to mention jousting with the minions of the Anti-Destination League on the Beltway, I had to lighten up. I took a couple of deep breaths and had this frivolous thought: What if Monica and Hillary came face-to-face and had the opportunity to go at it tooth and nail - who do you think would win?

Early handicapping gives The BIG M the weight advantage, but Hills gets the nod on pure meanness. My gut feeling is that age and treachery will undo youth and skill (and it's not clear that a valley girl like M has any real fighting skills - hasn't been in Washingtoon long enough. . . .)

Actually, ths isn't a bad idea. If they held it at the MCI Center and charged $50/seat, they could pay off a lot of Bubba's legal expenses. I wonder if I could sell this to the WWF? I wonder what was in the coffee this morning?

Gleefully, M2

PS: In order to keep this gun-related, let's open the venue to an iron cage death tag-team match. I'll put The Toady Sarah Brady on as Hillary's partner, Linda Tripp with the Sleazebag Miss M (definite weight advantage).

PPS: I understand that February 6th is Sarah's birthday, please buy a gun in honor of the occaision. If you can't buy a gun, at least go to a range and make a joyous noise.

[This message has been edited by Mike in VA (edited 02-02-99).]
 
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chink

New member
It was a celeberity death match. they ended up double teaming Bill. It was one of the first last year at during Halftime at the superbowl (XXXII)
 
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mckeea

New member
My moneys all over Hillary "my horny husband is our President" Clinton. She just looks plain mean to me.
 
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Kodiac

New member
I think there would be no fight...
Hillary would say "Better you did him than me!"
Monica would take her if it came to fists - younger, quicker, INSANE, longer nails, and nothing to lose... I think she would go for the jugular...
Hillary might just come on to her too.
 
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chink

New member
No far throwing Reno in. I thought it was a cat fight. Which implies that only women are fighting.
 
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HS

New member
How 'bout Cigars at 10 inches ?


"On guard"....

..3..2..1... POKE !...SLY Wink ;)

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"The Gun from Down Under !"
 
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Spectre

Staff Alumnus
<massive suggestion deleted> leaving a mushroom cloud. And, despite the radioactive particles, I would breathe easier tonight.
 
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4V50 Gary

Staff
Mike in VA. Your suggestion has got to be one of the most outrageous proposals ever to be suggested for a woman of Hillary Clinton's standing. To propose that the First Lady climb into the arena and engage in a hair pulling, face scratching, hamstringing knock down drag out wrassling cat fight has got to be the funniest thing I've ever read on the Internet. Your analysis of the two sides left me roaring with laughter.

Well done! I hope Rich or somebody else reads your posting to Mykl. Then again, his sutures may come undone.
 
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Mike in VA

New member
Glad you enjoyed it. I find that between listening to the news on the radio while dodging the other commuters (esp. those with cell phones, but that's another rant), I needed tolighten up.

Now if you really want to engage in flights of fancy (sic), expand the WWF theme and start thinking about costuming . . . Hillary in head-to-foot black lycra with a turqoise sequined thunderbolt across the chest, Monica in a thong with an emerald peek-a-boo halter top with 'EL Producto' logos on each cup . . . then there Sarah and Linda . . .the poosibilities are endless. . . and it really isn't much sillier that what really goes on in Washington. M2

[This message has been edited by Mike in VA (edited 02-03-99).]
 
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chink

New member
I thinking Steel Cage Ladder death match. On of those matches were you have to get on a ladder and grab something hanging from the ceiling, like ...Oh I don't know... ahh Bill's balls

garrick
 
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hksigwalther

New member
I cannot believe there is even a doubt. It's quite clear that judging from the newsreel footage of ML that she is a wuss and a weakling. I seriously doubt that ML has lifted anything heavier than a Big Mac (McDonald's or Bill's), and judging from the bouncy airhead walk and look, she would drop to the mat and start crying from a light slap on the face. I'm positive HC is more than capable and aggressive enough to take it to her and do at least that much in the opening round. Ding. ML wouldn't know what to do with her weight advantage.

Hmmm. WWF Royal Rumble-style with ML, HC, SB, LT, and JR in a Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome cage setting. Hmmm, yeah. JR topless in a thong suspended in the air with a chainsaw. YEAH. FIVE TWITS ENTER, ONE TWIT LEAVE!! FIVE TWITS ENTER, ONE TWIT LEAVE!! Dire times here.

- Ron V.

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Hal

New member
Hmmm, Spartacus type ending. Fight to the death, crucify the winner.

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A free people ought not only to be armed but disciplined;
George Washington Jan 8,1790--There can be no doubt about the Second Amendment.
 
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Jeff Thomas

New member
Mike, this match would probably qualify as 'mud wrestling' even without the mud. It was fun until we threw in Janet Reno - oooh, that's an ugly mental picture.
 
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