Unexpected request from the wife today

[osbornk]

My wife of over 51 years has never fired a gun of any kind. Over many years she has gone from someone terrified to be around guns to someone who understands why I love them and the only question she has asked when I bought the last few was "do you have room for it?" When she sees or hears about violence, she sometimes says "they needed a gun."

While I was gone today, someone came to the house promoting something to do with kids. He was young and didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary but he made her nervous.

As we were sitting in the family room, she looked over to where I keep some of my guns and asked if they were locked up. I told her all of my guns are always locked up. She said she wanted me to give her an unloaded gun. When I asked her why, she said she might someday need to point it at someone to get them to leave. I wouldn't dream of doing it but she was serious.

 

[Aguila Blanca]

Did you explain why pretending to be armed by carrying an unloaded gun is a recipe for disaster?

Did you also explain to her that, under the law of most states (please verify for your state) pointing an unloaded gun at someone is the same as pointing a loaded gun and, if not legally justified, could result in her arrest and trial on charges of armed assault?

 

[jmr40]

My wife and I volunteer with a group that searches for missing people. About 5 years ago we were involved in a search for someone thought to have committed suicide in an abandoned mobile home park in Florida. There were dozens of abandoned homes, but many homeless and drug addicts were camping out in them.

We were advised that anyone with a permit valid in Florida to carry and I did so. We had no problems, in fact once the homeless found out what we were doing most were helpful and even assisted. But after that experience my wife asked to get her own carry permit. She had never fired a gun before either. She still doesn't like it, but will practice just enough that she knows how to operate one and can make hits at close range.

Probably the biggest advantage of her having a permit is that many times it is a LOT easier for her to carry my gun in her purse than for me to carry.

 

[cjwils]

Don't know about your state, but I understand that in some areas displaying a gun when you do not really need to shoot to defend yourself is called brandishing, which is a crime.

 

[USNRet93]

My wife of over 51 years has never fired a gun of any kind. Over many years she has gone from someone terrified to be around guns to someone who understands why I love them and the only question she has asked when I bought the last few was "do you have room for it?" When she sees or hears about violence, she sometimes says "they needed a gun."

While I was gone today, someone came to the house promoting something to do with kids. He was young and didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary but he made her nervous.

As we were sitting in the family room, she looked over to where I keep some of my guns and asked if they were locked up. I told her all of my guns are always locked up. She said she wanted me to give her an unloaded gun. When I asked her why, she said she might someday need to point it at someone to get them to leave. I wouldn't dream of doing it but she was serious.

Sounds like my wife of 47 years and my daughter in law..both went from not really liking the guns I and my son has, to indifference to 'maybe I should go shoot and learn how to use one, just in case'..sounds like your wife is about there. Had some person come up to my son's house with a really crappy, fake 'foreign' accent trying to sell some kids instructional something...while I was nannying 6 and 8 year old..ya never know..

Daughter in law is going to go shoot my little M380 revolver and probably carry that when she walks to her car, at night, alone(nurse-BIG city hospital).

But after that experience my wife asked to get her own carry permit. She had never fired a gun before either. She still doesn't like it, but will practice just enough that she knows how to operate one and can make hits at close range.

Ayup...

 

[Atla]

Sounds like a good start and an opener to having a good discussion.

Good luck. She just might be packing by next year after all.

 

[jmhyer]

I agree with what others have said.

I would also add, though, that she should never open the door for anyone that she doesn't know. Talking through a locked door and telling them to go away is the best way to deal with that. If they don't go away immediately, she should tell them that she is calling the police.

 

[aarondhgraham]

My sister asked me for somewhat the same favor,,,
She wanted the loan (gift) of a small .22 handgun.

She just wanted to fire it in the ground if she was accosted while walking her dog.

I declined to give her what she asked for,,,
I did offer to take her to the range and teach her how to shoot a small revolver.

I have a 3" Model 36 that would be ideal for her,,,
She declined that offer though.

She insisted she could never shoot anyone, even if they were attacking her,,,
I told her I would buy her one of those loud hand-held air horns instead.

Aarond

.

 

[Howland]

Sounds like my wife of 47 years and my daughter in law..both went from not really liking the guns I and my son has, to indifference to 'maybe I should go shoot and learn how to use one, just in case'..sounds like your wife is about there. Had some person come up to my son's house with a really crappy, fake 'foreign' accent trying to sell some kids instructional something...while I was nannying 6 and 8 year old..ya never know..

Daughter in law is going to go shoot my little M380 revolver and probably carry that when she walks to her car, at night, alone(nurse-BIG city hospital).


Ayup...

Your daughter-in-law has to consider the policy of the hospital where she works, likely it is a zero tolerance GFZ.

She could take her chances and put her job and possibly her proffession​ at risk, she could consider changing jobs to a facility that has a lower risk or perhaps even request a security escort to her car that is hopefully in a hospital parking lot.

I know what choice I would make, but she needs to know what the consequences could be and make her own, informed decision.

 

[osbornk]

Sounds like a good start and an opener to having a good discussion.

Good luck. She just might be packing by next year after all.

I'm not sure it is wise to teach a 71 year old woman to shoot when she has never shot a gun in her life.

 

[USNRet93]

Your daughter-in-law has to consider the policy of the hospital where she works, likely it is a zero tolerance GFZ.

She could take her chances and put her job and possibly her proffession​ at risk, she could consider changing jobs to a facility that has a lower risk or perhaps even request a security escort to her car that is hopefully in a hospital parking lot.

I know what choice I would make, but she needs to know what the consequences could be and make her own, informed decision.

I'm sure if were to carry, probably in a bag, when going out to her car, she will have checked with her employer as to the rules and regs of her hospital.

And for right above.

I'm not sure it is wise to teach a 71 year old woman to shoot when she has never shot a gun in her life.

Why?? What's unique about a 71 YO woman than makes teaching her to shoot a bad idea?

 

[blackwidowp61]

We once lived in a rough area of the city. My wife and I were awakened at about 2am by somebody banging on our front dthat she had oor. I grabbed the Ruger MK 1 and headed downstairs to answer the door. I opened the door with the gun at my hip and was looking at a LEO! I quickly popped the gun behind my back, out of sight. The officer told me that she had noticed that a car in the parking lot had a leak. She ran the plates and decided to tell us about it. She then wanted me to come out and look at it.

While I had been listening, my wife had come to the top of the stairs. As soon as I noticed her up there, I started waving the gun behind my back in the hope that she would notice and come down and retrieve it (no CCW at the time and I didn't want to startle the officer and have her service weapon in my gut). Just as the officer was asking me to come out, the wife caught on and grabbed the pistol as she passed by.

This was one of those moments where I was justified for answering the door with a gun ready at hand, but it could have lead to some real drama, although back then, police weren't getting shot and ambushed like they are today and she may have handled the situation in a cool manner.

 

[Ricekila]

71 YO woman[/I] than makes teaching her to shoot a bad idea?

With our Women on Target classes - I had one 70+ Granny that never held a firearm before -- the first time she hit the target -- she jumped ( not very far - LOL ) up and down like a 5 year old ---

She couldn't understand why when she turned with the 10/22 at waist level - I ripped it out of her hands --

Then I popped off a round or two showing her there was two left in the mag

 

[ammo.crafter]

wfe

Have a qualified third party teach her how to handle a gun...much better than you instructing.

I good instructor will have her shooting (after he/she is satisfied that she is competent) several different types of handguns.

She will undoubtedly find the one that she is comfortable with and can shoot effectively.

 

[T. O'Heir]

"...she was serious..." Best you take her to some CCW classes. She needs to learn the difference between pointing and shooting. Plus just how dangerous pointing an empty firearm at some criminal can be. And cjwills' point about brandishing. That'd be different in every jurisdiction though.
"...a 71 YO woman..." It's all about how one teaches said woman. It's got nothing to do with her age though. Buddy of mine was coaching on a CF Militia recruit SMG course years ago when a guy's weapon malfunction and the FNG turned towards him with a loaded weapon. Same as the 10/22 at waist level only it was a Sterling SMG. Calmness and experience prevailed.

 

[USNRet93]

With our Women on Target classes - I had one 70+ Granny that never held a firearm before -- the first time she hit the target -- she jumped ( not very far - LOL ) up and down like a 5 year old ---

She couldn't understand why when she turned with the 10/22 at waist level - I ripped it out of her hands --

Then I popped off a round or two showing her there was two left in the mag

OK..I'll find the video of the 20 something woman shooting an AK for the first time and doing the very same thing, pointing it at the guy making the video...sorry..being into the 7th decade doesn't equal dumb, untrainable, etc...for a man or woman...

Here 'tis

https://www.bing.com/videos/search?...87AD23BD7B2FA42FB8CC87AD23BD7B2F&&FORM=VRDGAR

 

[Bottom Gun]

At 65, my wife asked me to teach her how to shoot. I did, starting with a K22 revolver, and she learned to shoot pretty well.
She has been carrying a S&W Chief Special for years now and she also enjoys shooting benchrest rimfires.

 

[Skans]

"When I asked her why, she said she might someday need to point it at someone to get them to leave. I wouldn't dream of doing it but she was serious."

I'll be the odd man out here. I say, give her an unloaded gun and let her "play" with it. By play, I mean work the action, dry fire it, handle it etc. If my wife of 20 years asked to handle one of my guns, I'd ask her which one out of the safe she wanted to handle, check to make sure it was unloaded and then let her explore it a little bit. See if she wants to do a little shooting with it. Get a little range time in with the wife.

The bottom line - it's a start to where you may actually be able to share your hobby with your wife, if you approach it the right way. Save all of the the legal crap for later.