So, what are the chances of something similar happening in America?
The chances of a terrorist attack in America are exceptionally good. Why this sort of attack hasn't happened yet is a bit surprising. The big difference would be that the response by law enforcement would be quicker and significantly more substantial. After the initial response by street officers who may or may not have long guns, follow-up response would definitely include officers with semi and/or full automatic long guns and much more ammunition. If the attack managed to last more than a few hours, then no doubt additional local (surrounding area) and federal resources would have time to arrive on scene as well.
Let me know what you think of it. I'm looking for critical feedback.
You may not be concerned with editorial issues, but what is with the weird time dentotations? What write "9.00am" instead of "9:00 am"
On page 1 of Movement to Mumbai, you note that Romeo departs via taxi for CST Railway Station. Before this time, you have not said who or what Romeo is. Later I read that Romeo is on of the terrorist teams. Maybe you should include something earlier on denoting people and team names so that the reader will better understand. From this initial mention of the name, I thought Romeo was the name of an individual, not a team.
On page 2 of Movement to Mumbai, just how do you know things like the rubber life raft was inflated after the crew and captain have been killed?
Some for Tango 1 and 2 as with Romeo.
In Romeo Gets Sideways, you refer to "Romeo" and "Team Romeo" Are they one in the same?
Who or what is Team Oscar?
What are NSG Commandos?
What is Navy MARCOS?
Who is November? Is November the same as Team November?
In The Fight for Taj Mahal Hotel, you note that NSG engage "Tango." Do you mean that they engaged "a" Tango or is "Tango" a specific designation. How is "Tango" different from "Tango 1" and "Tango 2" mentioned previously?
In your Mumbai Attack Timeline and Order of Battle, you finally designate names, but this is after they have already been used in a confusing manner.
Previously you had designated nautical miles to be "nm" but revert here to the long spelling. You also changed the format for writing time (e.g. 4pm instead of the 4.00pm used earlier)
You seem to keep switching back and forth in your name designations, such as November and Team November. It may be meaningless, but since this is a technical report, I would assume that such designations would imply different meanings, only you never say one way or the other. If such inconsistencies have no meaning difference, then it makes your report look sloppy even if it is factually correct.
2nd page of the timeline, cafe is in lower case and should be a cap as it is a proper name.
Your whole timeline issue seems to be a duplicate of information presented early on, but with new information added that was not seen early on. Some names are clarified in the timeline that were not clear at the beginning. In short, this presentation is a bit of an organizational nightmare. If I were you, I would delete the Movement to Mumbai section and following sections until the timeline and start the timeline right after the Terrorist Equipment page. I suggest this because the timeline has information not in the Movement section that clarifies many of your vague references in the Momvement and following sections. Incorporate the maps into the relevant locations of the timeline.
Sorry if these comments sound picky, but Jedburgh Corp is supposed to be a professional company. This report has a lot of inconsistencies and is organizationally-challenged, which causes confusion. Is that how you want Jedburgh to be perceived?
