WARNING, some of the options involve firearms and alcohol. Please be sure all firearms are unloaded and the ammunition stored safely in a separate room. Tempers can flare while listening to the "risky schemes" proposed during this convention, and we wouldn't want anyone actually shooting the TV and having to answer to their wives. 
1) Turn the volume all the way down and turn on closed captioning. This way you can read the speeches and not have to listen to the whiny voices. You also realize how idiotic the ideas are when you read them and aren't distracted by the candidates voice and audience applause.
2) Using an UNLOADED 1911, AND ALL AMMO SAFELY STORED IN ANOTHER ROOM, dry fire at the candidates and any other liberal who pisses you off.
3) Using an UNLOADED AR-15, AND ALL AMMO SAFELY STORED IN ANOTHER ROOM dry fire at the candidates and any other liberal who pisses you off. For a real touch of poetry, use a PRE-CLINTON-BAN AR-15!
4) When clinton speaks, tape a strip of paper to the bottom of your TV which says: "He Lies Under Oath". Now as you listen to what he says, do you believe him? (idea courtesy of Rush Limbaugh)
The next few steps involve liquor of your choice and this author recommends caution as you can get very hammered, very quickly.
5) Do a shot every time they go live to an info babe (female reporter) on the "floor of the convention"
6) Do two shots every time you hear the name Monica Lewinsky.
7) Do a shot and double tap (with a handgun) every time you see the reverend Al Sharpton
8) Do a shot and double tap (with a handgun) every time you see the reverend Jesse Jackson.
9) Keep count of how many different swear words you can string together in one sentence as you're yelling at some liberal spouting off about "saving the children" by taking away your rights.
10) Finally, keep reminding yourself how YOU CAN'T WAIT UNTIL ELECTION DAY SO YOU CAN VOTE AGAINST THESE SOCIALISTS!
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The first step is registration, the second step is confiscation, the final step is subjugation.
[This message has been edited by ds1973 (edited August 15, 2000).]
1) Turn the volume all the way down and turn on closed captioning. This way you can read the speeches and not have to listen to the whiny voices. You also realize how idiotic the ideas are when you read them and aren't distracted by the candidates voice and audience applause.
2) Using an UNLOADED 1911, AND ALL AMMO SAFELY STORED IN ANOTHER ROOM, dry fire at the candidates and any other liberal who pisses you off.
3) Using an UNLOADED AR-15, AND ALL AMMO SAFELY STORED IN ANOTHER ROOM dry fire at the candidates and any other liberal who pisses you off. For a real touch of poetry, use a PRE-CLINTON-BAN AR-15!
4) When clinton speaks, tape a strip of paper to the bottom of your TV which says: "He Lies Under Oath". Now as you listen to what he says, do you believe him? (idea courtesy of Rush Limbaugh)
The next few steps involve liquor of your choice and this author recommends caution as you can get very hammered, very quickly.
5) Do a shot every time they go live to an info babe (female reporter) on the "floor of the convention"
6) Do two shots every time you hear the name Monica Lewinsky.
7) Do a shot and double tap (with a handgun) every time you see the reverend Al Sharpton
8) Do a shot and double tap (with a handgun) every time you see the reverend Jesse Jackson.
9) Keep count of how many different swear words you can string together in one sentence as you're yelling at some liberal spouting off about "saving the children" by taking away your rights.
10) Finally, keep reminding yourself how YOU CAN'T WAIT UNTIL ELECTION DAY SO YOU CAN VOTE AGAINST THESE SOCIALISTS!
------------------
The first step is registration, the second step is confiscation, the final step is subjugation.
[This message has been edited by ds1973 (edited August 15, 2000).]