Still not enough info Sam, but let me do this. I am not trying to start a controversy with anyone, just inform you of what I think is the best, most effective method for shooting.
I can't give you the entire lesson, because it would be too long but here are the salient points:
Stand more or less facing the target (we'll adjust that in a moment), feet shoulder width apart. You should stand in a manner that you would be comfortable standing in all day. Typically, your weak side foot will be a little in front of your strong side foot. Stand erect, there should be a straight line that runs down your shoulder blades, butt and heels. Don't lean forward or backward. Your arms should be extended, but not hyper-extended. Bring the gun up to eye level, not vice versa. Keep your shoulders down and RELAX. The last word in that sentence is the key! Don't lock your elbows but keep your wrists firm. This will allow your elbows to act as shock absorbers and helps convert some of the upward movement into backward movement. Your grip should be loose and relaxed. The gun should be centered in the web between the thumb and forefinger of your strong hand.
Don't try to squeeze the gun like a lemon, just relax. Your thumb should be as high as possible because it will help drive the gun.
Your weak hand goes in the gap left by your strong hand. The actual grip is created by a pinching action between the strong and weak hands.
Note the position of the weak hand thumb. It is necessary to rotate the weak hand wrist forward. You do that to keep your stance neutral. Because the gun will be centered in front of your strong hand eye, your arms will not be bent the same and your stance will not be neutral unless you do. Neither thumb should exert any pressure on the gun. They should just rest where they are. The key is neutrality.
One last tip:
Find your natural point of aim. To do that, get in your stance, line your gun up on the target. Close your eyes and twist left and right from the hip (don't move your feet). Stop when it feels comfortable. Check and see where the gun is laterally relative to the target, then adjust your stance (by moving your feet) until the gun is on target. Repeat until the gun stops on target. That is your natural point of aim, eventually you will know it without the exercise.
It sounds to me like you are locking your elbows and shoulders and not keeping your wrists firm which allows the gun to rise, but not return.
