I just bought the Les Baer PII in 9mm. With five extra mags it was over $2,000. There are a lot of folks talking about the STI Trojan, Kimber and SA 9mm, all around or just under $1,000. Mine came with a 15 lb spring. I have a 10 lb and will be fiddling around with light loads to see if I can get it to be reliable with a lighter recoil spring.
I wonder if you have a light spring to try on your .45. There is no difference between the .45 and 9mm as far as slide size and feel, so if she can rack the .45 with the light spring she will be able to rack the 9mm.
I'm getting arthritis in my fingers and shoulder, so understand where she's coming from.
For just a few more dollars you could get her a really nice Wilson. She does like guns better than jewelry, right?