"I'm sure the .357 will have the penetration, same with the .38, right?"
Maybe, maybe not.
The only way to know for sure is to use TESTED ammo.
To get a look at testing data, simply go to google.com, and enter the name and a few characteristics about the bullet you're looking at; i.e.
Federal hydrashok .357 penetration
That will bring up a number of possible matches that you can search through.
Take a look at this website. It will give you some starting information:
http://www.firearmstactical.com/ammo_data/357magnum.htm
As you get farther into the selection process, you're going to start seeing a LOT of different stuff on what constitutes a good defensive handgun round, from the "One Shot Stop" junk done by Marshall and Sanow to those who advocate light, hyper fast bullets that supposedly cause incapacitation through systemic shock (a myth, according to some doctors).
As far as I'm concerned, the single most important criteria is PENETRATION.
If a round has a hyperfast velocity but doesn't penetrate deeply enough, chances are it's going to get you killed.
If a round penetrates deeply, but doesn't expand, it's STILL more desirable than a round that mushrooms beautifully but still fails to penetrate deeply enough to disrupt vital structures.
I know I catch a lot of disagreement with this stance, but a round that goes completely through the intended target it still more desirable than a round that doesn't penetrate deeply enough.
Finally, given two rounds with different bullet weights, but which show roughly equal, and adequate, penetration and bullet expansion, but which differ in raw foot pounds of energy...
Which should you choose?
As far as I'm concerned, they are BOTH equally valid choice because they both penetrate and expand similarly even though they have different power figures.
Quite frankly, a different in 20, 50, or even 100 foot pounds is NOT going to make that much of a difference. Adequate penetration combined with expansion will.